Stop foodiecism ‘fu’d:e:sis:um


foodieist ‘fu’d:e:isit foodiecism ‘fu’d:e:sis:um
a person who believes that a particular food is superior to another. She was fearful of being called a foodieist. 
having or display beliefs that single out a particular food as being superior to another: we are investigating objections about foodieist belligerents at a culinary magazine. ©Marc Lamash 2014

You Know The Buffet Is Going To Be Good When;

You Know The Buffet Is Going To Be Good When;

You know the Chinese buffet is gonna be good when your table number is written with a fine tipped Sharpie. The masking tape marked with the undisputed champ of food quality monikers “A1”. It could also be considered my temporary house arrest ID, Until my debt/check is paid. In my case it was an omen of things to come. It reminded me of the Book “The Black pearl” where the emaciatedly poor farmer shouts to the heavens; “Bad Rice, Bad Rice!” In hopes of faking out the wheelers and dealers of Human fate. To grant this lowly farmer a good crop and a chance to live another year.
In my head I did the same and mentally screamed; “Bad Food Bad Food!”. The Culinary Gods this time would not hear my plea and would not invoke any Yum Yum Mojo upon my plate of food. Instead they would clean out the celestial fridge on high. Letting loose from deepest freon induced slumber a hoard of off tasting, bad smelling unworldly things. Things best left to have been casted out and banished to the underworld or, at the very least composted, 😉

The Magic Rain Chairs

Starbucks on Astor Pl. Roof is leaking. The only two free seats that happen to be postioned under a major leak have had many takers. Alas no one has been able to tame the bewitched Rain chairs(or move them anywhere else). Beverage laden tourists walk up to the chairs, setup shop. Making a temporary beverage shelter for them and their clan.They make it their own by splaying out carefully all the newly garnered Starbucks provisions. Giving a visual sign to all, “this space is taken. Keep to the coffee trail, Keep moving.” all the others that paid their dues at the Rain Chairs now somberly stare at the ground in unifying silence while the unassuming coffee gazelle’s hunches are ripped out from under them.

Life’s brutal lessons continue like they have for countless coffee millennia (in coffee years about 4 hours). Next life altering challenge; Get on line and wait for the restroom. Open the door to the restroom without touching the door. Pay homage to the ceramic shrine, using as many of the rooms vast amenities( minus the nicly tagged baby station) as possible. Without putting down my shetland pony sized Kmart bag (can be done). Wish me luck.