Why so blue adorable pink Bunny? I’ve been there Pal (see crazed tiger stage right) and totally sympathize. Cheer up my fuzzy little critter cuz, because? There’s light at the end of this Pisher Price tunnel and it’s called the “Fuzzy Boomerang”. (no kid, not duzy boo boo aang) It works like this; first, you need to wait till you folks are old enough to be ever so slightly roughed up but not so much as to traumatize them into standing in front of your childhood home barking like a Shitzu.
Next you’ll need get a van. Preferably one that is high enough to keep from hitting their head but low enough as not to throw a hip or cause a hernia, or or break your dam iPhone in your back pocket with your “Buns of Steel” again.
I recommend making the extra effort and investment of procuring bubble wrap and packing peanuts. To fill the van prior to tossing folks in. I mean come on they are you folks so take the extra care with them.
When the van is prepped and ready call the restaurant to make the reservations. Try to make them at the nearest and preferably the best (good luck finding a good place never mind the best) “all you can eat” buffet. Why an all you eat buffet? Because they’re like a warm Kryptonite sleepytime hug to parents (non lethal ).
Like drunken bees they’ll just kind of aimlessly roll around going buzz buzz we’re drunkin bees he he he. They are now harmless with all defenses deactivated so act quickly.
Now is not the time to dilly dally. As everybody knows the effects of an American Asian styled buffet are temporary and will were off in 15 minutes maybe less. Unless they hit the dessert section twice then tops you’ve got 23 minutes before they get hungry and snap out of it.
Once thrown into the van (enlist siblings and cousins who’ve gotten similar “Christmas Story-ish” wearable gifts from them to help) Take shoes off by rapidly unlacing, making use of a shoe horn can only help in picking up the pace . In most cases the “Shoe removal” part of the show will just simply be the task of unfastening two Velcro straps in one skilled motion. Once shoes are off slide on and secure oversized Bunny outfits you and your extended family made at your quilting sessions at the local community center. Send copies of your pictures to CNN ‘s AndersonCooper with the rest to be used for annually mailed out Christmas/Holiday cards till they run out or the Governor grants a pardon. 😉 kidding of course. Love ya Mom&Dad.
Picture of bunny kid on swing in left picture is from http://www.imfunny.net
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